Many moons ago a Chinese political leader theorized that the earth’s populace lived in either First, Second or Third World nations based on their country’s politico-economic development: the first world consisting of superpowers and fully developed nations, the second world of lesser-still developing powers, and the third world of exploited and underdeveloped nations.
Lest we continue to moan and groan about our various lots in life, I thought we could all use a moment of reflection…
YOU KNOW YOU’RE LIVING IN THE FIRST WORLD IF:
- The tooth fairy can afford to keep up with the cost of living. (In my day, you got a quarter. These days, an American kid is likely to get a dollar…a fiver if the tooth fairy forgot to get change.)
- The tooth fairy shows up.
- Your child knows what Edamame or Calamari is and orders it in restaurants.
- Your kids eat in restaurants.
- At elementary school, your child asks his friend what server he’ll be on when he gets home from school so they can hook up on Minecraft.
- You are frustrated by the fact that the zipline your husband was clever enough to build in the backyard, from scratch, holds no interest for your children six months later. (True story)
- Your kid loves mommy and me time even when being dragged through a boring department store, because she loves the lunch menu at Nordstrom.
- You live within a few miles of a stunningly beautiful body of water that tourists flock to while on vacation… but don’t take advantage of it. It’ll still be there later. Maybe after your personal trainer has helped you slim down enough to get into a smoking hot bikini.
- You made the decision to move your kid out of the Distinguished California Public School he or she was attending because the Alternative School in the next town over will allow your free spirit to learn in an unstructured environment.
- You ever feel the desire to throw out all of your kids’ toys because you are sick of stepping on them at every turn.
- You are incensed by the skyrocketing prices at Disneyland…which your family still intends to pay next week.
Let’s all take a moment of silence…in gratitude.